|John William Waterhouse: The Danaïdes – 1903|
”Is there another destiny for you? Do you choose a road that will take you to a place foreign to your own becoming? This question is sincere, it is not meant to deceive. No matter which road you take, you will become; but all roads do not lead to your becoming. If you think they do, it is you, not I, who is given to deception. All of your roads will end in death. Not all roads lead to life.” ~ Cynthea Jones
Lots of personal work coming down the pipe lately, specifically relating to codependency in behavior and thought. The work is both gentler and deeper than what I have experienced in years past, heck, even in the recent past. It is more like a river wearing away rock than lighting taking out a tower, and I am thankful for that.
I’ve known I’ve had codependency issues for a long time. Early home life (which included living with a dry drunk and a codependent, a topic that will probably get its own blog post in the future) set a secure foundation for this pattern, but I’ve built the grand landscape I’ve been living in, and it’s high time I made some architectural changes for better living conditions. It became abundantly clear to me that this is necessary and timely work a few weeks ago, and the Universe has conspired to get me moving through a variety of synchronistic events.
And so: I started reading “Codependents’ Guide to the Twelve Steps” by Melody Beattie. The work is deep and appropriate and just challenging enough.
I am sure I will be able to write about this process with more depth and specifics at a future date. Today, however, it is enough to write that I am actively working on recovery.
I LOVE Melody Beattie. I have Codependent No More and Beyond Codependence. Love them. I probably passed up the 12 steps onwe because my superior self would say she has nothing to tell ME about the 12 steps. Sometimes I just have to tell superior self to shut up! Co dependence is cunning, baffling, and pwerful. It sneaks up and I, at least, often don't see it coming.